Say “No” to Emotional Dependency Cords

After a baby is born she will depend on her mother to meet her physical and emotional needs.  As she reaches toddler-hood it is natural for her to start cutting the emotional dependency cords. This is to show her independence as an individual. We’ve all seen a toddler stamp her foot and say “no”.

All forms of animal life from baby birds to humans find a way for offspring to cut the cords of dependency.

Bird in flight-2


Can you image how restrictive and tangled up everyone would be if none of the emotional dependency cords were ever cut?  It would be a cluttered mess!

Now think about your materialistic items.  Have you attached emotional dependency cords to many of them?  It’s easy to figure out.  Ask yourself these questions.

  1. Do you hate an item but can’t get rid of it because it was a gift from a family member or close friend? (Guilt)
  2. Are you afraid they will question you about what happen to it when they come over? (Fear)
  3. Are you tired of an item or don’t like it anymore but feel bad about getting rid of it because you paid a lot for it? (Guilt)
  4. Did you inherit an item that you don’t like it or have a place for it, but feel bad because it belonged to someone you loved who is now gone? (Guilt)
  5. Do you keep something just in case you need it “someday” even if you haven’t used the item for several years? (Fear)
  6. Do you hold on to something because you just know it will be worth a fortune someday? (Fear)

It’s time to get rid of these of items because they are holding you prisoner.  They are attached by an emotional dependency cord. You will never have your independence unless you learn to say “no” to the guilt and fear these items are creating in you.

So how do you do this?

As adults sometimes we think too much to a point that we let irrational thinking rule our lives.  Maybe it’s time to get back to a toddler mindset. It’s okay to stamp your foot and tell that item “no”. Cut the cord and declare your independence!

Then use your adult thinking to get rid of the item by giving it away to a charity, selling it, recycling it, or putting it in the trash. You”ll love the freedom these actions give you.

To a lighter load along the way.


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Prevent Holiday Clutter Build-up

It’s that time of year where we start shopping for holiday gifts for family and friends.  But will adding more things to our homes (and other’s homes) make them more cluttered? Donald-Duck-Gifts



It doesn’t have to be that way!


Below is a copy of a tip from the eBook ” How To Simplify And Organize Your Holidays”. It talks about a basic rule of clutter control; the in-and-out inventory rule. Although this tip is about children’s toys the same rule applies to any items in our home.

Start now to get rid of the old stuff so you have the room for the new things.

Tip# 11 – Simplify Your Holidays – Children’s Toys

One of the basic rules to control clutter is the in-and-out inventory rule.  When something new comes in, something old must go out.  This is the time of year where lots of new things come into the home.  How about getting rid of some of the old things?

Take the time to make room for all those new things, especially if you have young children who will be receiving gifts from grandparents, aunts and uncles, and you. Have your children go through all their old toys, with your help if necessary, and pull out the ones they don’t want anymore.

Throw away the broken ones.  Any toys that are in good shape can be taken to a local charity collection center (Goodwill, etc.).  This will help teach your children to get rid of the toys they no longer use and learn to bless others by donating them to a charity.

Their anticipation and appreciation for the new gifts will be even greater without the old unused toys cluttering up their rooms and lives.

To a lighter load along the way.


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Are You Ready for Halloween?

Sometimes life throws roadblocks in front of you.  The detour to get around them may be short or long.  When the detour is long certain things get pushed towards the bottom of the priority list.  Unfortunately this blog was one of those things.  But now I feel life is a little more under control so I’m back.

I’ll be sharing many of the lessons I’ve learned about clutter (my own and inherited clutter) in future blog posts.  But for now I want to help you with planning for Halloween.

Because Halloween is less than two weeks away I want to share some of my past blog posts about preparing for the holiday.  I wrote a series of posts called “Countdown to Halloween”.  Many of the ideas and tips are from the ebook “How To Have A Fun, Safe, And Decluttered Halloween”.

Since I consolidated my other blog “Organize By The Month” with this one I’m finding many of the links in the old posts need to be updated.  I’ve now updated all the links. If you have any questions, suggestions, etc. please let me know in the comment sections.


witch 1Countdown to Halloween Series Part 1/

Countdown to Halloween Series Part 2

Countdown to Halloween Series Part 3

Countdown to Halloween Series Part 4

Countdown to Halloween Series Part 5


If you’re feeling overwhelmed right now about Halloween, the eBook, “How To Have A Fun, Safe, And Decluttered Halloween” is loaded with a lot more tips to help you feel in control.  It’s available for only $2.99 at Amazon (Kindle), Barnes & Noble (Nook), and for your computer (PDF). Check out this page to find out more of what’s in the book.

To a lighter load along the way.



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Take Time For Gratitude

If the craziness of the season is starting to get to you then it’s time to take a a few minutes to relax.  Think about what you are grateful for in your life.  It can make a world of difference in how you feel.

Below is a prior post from my other blog, Organize By The Month.  Listed at the end are other posts I wrote on gratitude.  I hope they inspire you to be grateful for all that this holiday season offers.

To speak gratitude is courteous and pleasant, to enact gratitude is generous and noble, but to live gratitude is to touch Heaven.                        ~Johannes A. Gaertner

Blog Post:

It’s that time of year where we are so busy running around we forget to stop and smell the roses.  Okay, I know that’s a cliché.  For most people, at least in this country (U.S.), the rose bushes are dormant this time of year.

IMG_0888But that doesn’t mean you can’t stop to smell the roses       figuratively.  Look around for things to be grateful for. It just might be what you need to dress up your mood.

There are always things, people, and events in everyone’s life that are good. Sometimes we just have to stop rushing through life long enough to see them.

Some things to be grateful for:

  • the smile on your child’s face when you kiss them goodnight
  • a roof over your head
  • food to eat
  • clothes and shoes to wear
  • that fact that you are reading this blog post on a computer – you can read!
  • your dog or cat greeting you when you get home – pets love unconditionally
  • freedom to celebrate your religious holiday
  • your family’s and your own health

The list goes on and on.  Take a few minutes each day to write down the things you are grateful for. Create a gratitude journal with a fancy journal, spiral notebook, or even on your smartphone or computer. It doesn’t matter how you do it.

The important thing is to write down what you are grateful for. Then read it anytime you feel overwhelmed, out of sorts, or depressed. Heck, you might want to read it first thing each morning to dress your day up right. You’ll be amazed how something this simple can have such a profound positive effect on your attitude.

Below are some previous posts I wrote about gratitude. Check them out for more motivation and ideas on how you can start wearing gratitude to help put a smile on your face.

“He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.” ~Epictetus

“If you count all your assets, you always show a profit.” ~Robert Quillen

To a lighter load along the way.




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Some Clutter-free and Almost Clutter-free Gift Ideas


“It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.”                               ~ Mother Teresa

Has someone told you not to buy them any gifts? They don’t “need” anything. They claim they have way too many things in their home already.

You still want to get them something but don’t want to add to their “too many things”.

Maybe it’s time to consider some clutter-free gifts that they will enjoy and you won’t feel guilty about giving it to them..

Below are some lists of clutter-free and almost clutter free gift ideas. Continue reading

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Prevent Holiday Clutter Build-up


Are those mouth watering cookies and candies already blowing your diet?



Is it overwhelming you just thinking about getting all the Christmas decorations unpacked and put up?



Christmas presents

Are you starting to panic about all the gifts you have to wrap? How many have you already bought and how many do you still need to buy?


Continue reading

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Diary of a Kitchen Remodel Update

It’s been a few weeks since I wrote about the kitchen remodel.  The contractor started on November 18, so we are half way through the 3rd week.  Of course with Thanksgiving last week we lost a couple of days.

I’m amazed how much has been done in 10 working days, most of those with only one person working. So far there have been very few glitches. Either I have a fantastic contractor or I’m incredibly lucky. I think it’s a little of both.

When I think about all the horror stories about kitchen remodels I keep my fingers crossed and hope each day ends on a positive note. Continue reading

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How To Stop Catalog (Paper) Clutter

It’s that time of year where the catalogs fill up your mailbox.  How many times do you receive a catalog that you’ve never heard of?

Maybe you received a mail ordered gift from someone. Now your name is on their list.

Maybe you ordered something from one catalog. They sold their customer list to another company. Your name was on it.

Maybe you ordered online. That company may have sold their customer list.

There are multiple ways your name may have gotten on those lists but there are ways to stop the junk mail and catalogs from filling up your mailbox. Continue reading

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Ten Time Wasters – Which Ones Are You Guilty Of?

big_plain_clock_greenWe have a tendency to waste a lot of time, especially at this time of year.  Below are 10 time wasters that may be making it harder for you to get all those things on your list done (you do have a list, don’t you?).

You don’t have to be busy all the time. Nor do you want to.

Life is too precious and it’s so important to take the time to enjoy it.

But if you recognize where and when you are wasting time you can learn to be more productive.  In the long run that will give you more time to do the things you really enjoy. Continue reading

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Do You Have Pre-Holiday Syndrome?

Have the upcoming holidays already got your panic buttons going?

Do you feel lost and don’t know where to start first?

This time of year always reminds me of the quote from the movie “Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory” where Willy Wonka says;   Continue reading

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